With the election just around the corner, Donald Trump seems to be feeling the pressure. And the pressure, apparently, is just not good enough. During a rally in Nevada on Sunday the president launched into a bizarre rant about water pressure. First, he talked about subpar dishwashers, and how he called a guy in Ohio, did a deal, and now the dishwashers “work beautifully”. Then, I am sorry to say, he moved on to his bathroom issues.
“It’s the shower, it’s the sink, and you know the third element in the bathroom,” Trump complained. “But I don’t say it, because every time I say it, they only talk about that one,” he said, gesturing vaguely towards reporters. “Because it’s sort of gross to talk about, right? So I won’t talk about the fact that people have to flush their toilet 15 times. I will not talk about it. I’ll only talk about showers.” Trump, a man of his word, proceeded to talk about showers.
Perhaps you are getting a weird sense of deja vu? Don’t worry. Your brain isn’t broken: Trump, who no longer seems to have Covid-19 but still has uncontrollable logorrhoea, has delivered a variation of this diatribe before. In December 2019, the president announced that he’d issued an order to review water-saving regulations because “people are flushing toilets 10 times, 15 times”. Being a big-picture guy, Trump also reassured everyone the government was “looking very strongly at sinks and showers”. He made the comments in a roundtable meeting at the White House on 6 December but, it being an urgent issue and all, also brought the subject up during a Michigan rally on 18 December.
Why is Trump so obsessed with toilets? One imagines Freud would have had a theory or two. My own, very simple, explanation is that the guy is potty; he has worms in his brain and something horrible in his gut. Interestingly, however, Trump seems particularly bothered by bathroom issues during tough times. His 2019 rants were delivered as impeachment proceedings started. His latest loo-natic monologue was delivered with the election just weeks away, Joe Biden leading in the polls, and the number of people with coronavirus surging across the US. Is he subconsciously showing us he’s worried his career is about to get flushed down the toilet? Let’s hope so and let’s hope it happens: it’s time to dump Trump.
• Arwa Mahdawi is a Guardian columnist